Blood Results Came Back

I got called today on my blood results from last Thursday... still haven't ovulated. The nurse was surprised I hadn't started my period either... I don't understand why she would be surprised, since that is part of my problem as well...So, they are going to put me on another type of medication this time... oh goodie! Kind of frustrating; and equally hard because this is something we both want so badly. I know it is how I am made, but sometimes I can't help but feel "broken", Matt hates when I talk like this and he reminds me that I'm not broken and that we knew this was going to be difficult, but it's just annoying. One thing is for sure, when we do have a little one, it will definitely be spoiled and appreciated! :) Not that it wouldn't have before; but even more so!

So the new meds they are putting me on is called Letozole- or Femera is its other name. It apparently make a woman ovulate in a different way than Clomid does. And those that have not had any success on Clomid usually do well on Letozole. So we shall see. yay for re-setting my system over and over again! :) I am impressed with the care and attention I have been receiving- very proactive compared to my previous experiences.

The following was taken from: http://www.womenshealth.gov/faq/polycystic-ovary-syndrome.cfm#e

It just gives you guys a little more on PCOS and a nice visual.

How many women have PCOS?

Between 1 in 10 and 1 in 20 women of childbearing age has PCOS. As many as 5 million women in the United States may be affected. It can occur in girls as young as 11 years old.

[Return to Top]

What causes PCOS?

The cause of PCOS is unknown. But most experts think that several factors, including genetics, could play a role. Women with PCOS are more likely to have a mother or sister with PCOS.

A main underlying problem with PCOS is a hormonal imbalance. In women with PCOS, the ovaries make more androgens than normal. Androgens are male hormones that females also make. High levels of these hormones affect the development and release of eggs during ovulation.

Researchers also think insulin may be linked to PCOS. Insulin is a hormone that controls the change of sugar, starches, and other food into energy for the body to use or store. Many women with PCOS have too much insulin in their bodies because they have problems using it. Excess insulin appears to increase production of androgen. High androgen levels can lead to:

• Acne
• Excessive hair growth
• Weight gain
• Problems with ovulation

[Return to Top]

What are the symptoms of PCOS?

The symptoms of PCOS can vary from woman to woman. Some of the symptoms of PCOS include:

• Infertility (not able to get pregnant) because of not ovulating. In fact, PCOS is the most common cause of female infertility.
• Infrequent, absent, and/or irregular menstrual periods
• Hirsutism (HER-suh-tiz-um) — increased hair growth on the face, chest, stomach, back, thumbs, or toes
• Cysts on the ovaries
• Acne, oily skin, or dandruff
• Weight gain or obesity, usually with extra weight around the waist
• Male-pattern baldness or thinning hair
• Patches of skin on the neck, arms, breasts, or thighs that are thick and dark brown or black
• Skin tags — excess flaps of skin in the armpits or neck area
• Pelvic pain
• Anxiety or depression
• Sleep apnea — when breathing stops for short periods of time while asleep

[Return to Top]

Why do women with PCOS have trouble with their menstrual cycle and fertility?

The ovaries, where a woman’s eggs are produced, have tiny fluid-filled sacs called follicles or cysts. As the egg grows, the follicle builds up fluid. When the egg matures, the follicle breaks open, the egg is released, and the egg travels through the fallopian tube to the uterus (womb) for fertilization. This is called ovulation.

In women with PCOS, the ovary doesn't make all of the hormones it needs for an egg to fully mature. The follicles may start to grow and build up fluid but ovulation does not occur. Instead, some follicles may remain as cysts. For these reasons, ovulation does not occur and the hormone progesterone is not made. Without progesterone, a woman's menstrual cycle is irregular or absent. Plus, the ovaries make male hormones, which also prevent ovulation.

The cysts that are on sometimes burst, and cause really bad pain- I sometimes find myself doubling over or grabbing my abdomen/side. Not fun! :)

Apparently the new med I will be put on doesn't have as many side affects as Clomid does. Which will nice, since I didn't like the hormonal ups and downs it gave me. There is also a lower chance of conceiving multiples if I wind up ovulating with this medicine as well. So, we shall see what happens... I'm feeling hopeful.

And That's the Way the Cookie Crumbles

I am all sorts of emotional and anxious today...and I don't really know why. Maybe it's because I have a lot of things that are still "up in the air". I was working on writing a story this morning, and around 2pm realized I hadn't eaten yet, so I decided I would go out and find something to eat while getting our Emissions testing done. I still felt anxious and on edge while driving around and found myself going through mood swings and snapping at people (mainly my mom cuz she was with me).

Went through Emissions, failed it (always great news...) and I noticed that the car failed for the same thing it failed two years ago. So I called the garage up, and they told me to bring it in tomorrow... "yay". Our poor car, has so much going on with it. So I will take it in, if I don't get a sub job tomorrow. Just more of our Disney World fund going down the drain... well at least we have a way to get there and back and a place to say, even if we don't get to do anything else! :P

I have a headache and I feel drained and icky. I don't want to get sick, but I'm afraid I am heading that way. "le sigh".

Feeling disheartened and kinda... blahhh

*** DISCLAIMER: THIS POST IS ALL ABOUT BABY STUFF, and might be TMI at times, read at your own discretion. ***

I can't help but feel a little blah today... I just finished a book called "Plus Sized Pregnancy"... and I really liked it. It had a lot of great information and explanations of everything. I read the whole part on Labor, delivery and breast feeding and postpartum sections tonight. Matt came in and I told him that I was no longer sure I wanted to deliver the baby, and that he would owe me big time. :) Not really, I know, like all things I build it up to be worse in my mind than it will really turn out to be. For those of you that know me, will remember how much I was freaking out about my wedding night :P (hee hee).

So anyways, I still haven't heard back from the doc on the blood test results. I caved in and took a Pregnancy test, and that came back negative as well. I want a child so bad, it consumes me... I keep having dreams about holding our baby for the first time, and it aches when I wake up and realize it was a dream. I know that sounds kinda silly to those of you who are not "there" or don't feel that way about having kids or wanting kids. I have never experienced anything like this before. At the same time I still want to doubt the negative pregnancy test, because I feel some things...but it could be my body getting ready to menstruate as well. I just want to know that all the meds I am taking and blood tests and ultrasounds are actually helping the doctors know what to do with me. I know this will only be the 3rd month, but I feel like they should be upping dosage on other stuff... I just feel like I am in limbo all the time!

Matt keeps on reminding me that it's okay if it takes longer, and up to 6 months like my doc said the last time I saw her. We are going to Disney World in December and he tried to put a positive spin on it by stating that if I am not pregnant then, than at least I could ride all the rides. :) True and I wouldn't be as tired if I was pregnant...but still, it would be a cool baby-moon to go on :)

Again, what this all boils down to is patience. Constantly I am reminding myself that it isn't my will that is to be done... if we all got what we wanted or asked for every time, then we wouldn't appreciate anything that we have. The Patron Saint for mothers or those who wish to become pregnant is St. Gerard Majella. I learned of him when I first got pregnant last year, my sister in law gave me the medal she had worn while she was pregnant with my nephew. I have warn it almost every day since. I looked up some prayers, but nothing specifically for patience. But I did find out that his feast day is coming up on Oct. 15th. St. Anne and St. Anthony are also patron saints for fertility.

Ok, well I'm not going to go watch a chick flick (Killers) and try to feel better.

Long Awaited Update

Greetings friends... Sorry it's been awhile since the last update. I've been busy and a little under the weather. On Friday I had to go back in for another blood draw to see if I had ovulated last week. The results on my first blood draw were negative for ovulation. This is so frustrating! But I keep paying for patience in the matter... I want to take a pregnancy test, but I don't think I'm pregnant... although I have some symptoms. I think I will wait for my next blood results to come in. I know the doctor said it could take more than 6 months for my system to be "reset" or never... but it is so hard and disappointing to hear each month that you haven't ovulated, even though I have done all the "right things" and took the meds. ugh... patience, this is the lesson I am to learn.

This weekend was fun, I went to the Puyallup Fair and Saturday with some friends and ran into some other friends I haven't seen in awhile. That was a good surprise. It was the perfect day weather wise...Sunny and in the 70's!

Today I wasn't feeling so good, neither was Matt... poor guy. We made it through leading the youth group tonight. A lot of the other youth leaders weren't feeling so hot... I hope they are feeling better now though.

I'm taking tomorrow off and resting... Have a pleasant night! :)

Busy Weekend, Now Bring on the Week!

Hi everyone (or it might just be my hubby, Val and maybe Kate that read my blog :P, but hello nevertheless). I had a super busy weekend, but it was very rewarding. Before I get into it though, I want to update you on Operation Baby Bake, or OBB (pronounced, "oh bee bee"- said in a slightly high pitched voice).

Friday I went in to have my blood drawn; hopefully I will find out Monday or Tuesday whether or not my progesterone levels went up. The lady who drew my blood was awesome! I went in, told her where the blood is usually drawn from, and she found my vein right away! I don't think it took more than 10 seconds to fill the vial up, that is something unheard of when it comes to my blood. Hrm... I know that when you are pregnant, your blood volume goes up and it coerces through your body quicker... just saying hee hee j/k.. wishful thinking, I know! But I was so impressed, especially when I barely got a bruise! If you haven't checked out the very first or second post of this blog, you will see why I am so excited about this, plus I am terrified of needles! I've also been having some symptoms, but again, I'm trying not to psych myself out too much b/c my body is weird and it's too early for big time symptoms to show up... I am feeling things twinging in my uterus, and I have had side pains, gas, feeling tired, and moody at times... but I also had a busy week with working three days last week and cleaning the house in preparation for the weekend and this Wednesday. Then last night I had a dream where some weird old lady came up to me and told me I was pregnant, but I didn't know it... and I told her, "oh, well we're trying, but it hasn't worked yet, and I'm not pregnant," Then the old lady said, "Oh yes you are," and then she disappeared. My mom had a dream before she knew she was pregnant with me that she would have a baby girl by the next March, and she had me. My parents had tried for 10 years to have me.

So that's where I'm kinda at right now... in limbo- playing the waiting game. I use this web program called Fertility Friend, and it really is a great program. I track my temperature and other fertility signs in it, plus any meds I take and symptoms I feel. It makes analysis of my cycle based on the signs I plug in. It's kinda neat. It doesn't say I have ovulated yet, mainly because my temperature in the morning has been too low, still in the 96 degree range... and then the next day it might be in the 97 degree range and then back down again... my body is a roller coaster! What's a girl to do?

Anywho, so Saturday was awesome! Not only was it awesome because we had our last BBQ of the "summer" and friends came over, but we also got some new furniture. On Thursday I went to this store to check out prices (my step sister and her hubby had bought a cool sectional there)...they were soooo expensive and it would take them 6-10 weeks to deliver! WOWZA! So on my way home I happened to drive by this other furniture place I had seen before and popped in there since I knew I was going to go down to the other furniture shop we found a couch we liked at on Labor Day... AMAZING! I found my couch immediately... it was on sale for $848 ($150 off, due to coupon sale) and I got the Armoir for $198 and a tv stand for $200! Best deals ever and they delivered and took away our old couch! I am really pleased with the service and selection and prices at this place... Now I find it hard to leave the couch when I need to go to bed, or tomorrow when I get to go to work... One of these days I will take a comfy nap on the couch. I envy the kitties.

Later on Saturday we had our BBQ. It was great to see and hang out with some friends. I also got to go see the movie Easy A; which I thought was nicely done. After the movie got out, I was talking with a friend about the main character and how she was portrayed in the movie. (Don't worry I'm not going to give anything away)... But we were both impressed with how she never had to be "saved" by a guy, or even another friend or parent. She got herself into and out of several messes and she wasn't a "spoiled" teen, and also had a positive relationship with her family-which is rarely seen in a lot of today's shows... the teen is always angsty and hates their parents b/c they are ruining their lives.

Today was also a great day as my aunt invited Matt and I and my dad and step mom to go to the Mariners game. I love the Mariners, I know they really suck this year (and mostly for the past few years) but I am a true fan. I love it, there has always been something about me and baseball, it's in me bones... I love the park, the fans, the songs, the goofy mascots and games that are played... I could have, however, done without the smell of hot dogs wafting through the air... hot dogs really make me feel sick lately when I smell them, or even think about them...it's weird. It's not as though I've had a bunch of hot dogs lately either. Just...ick! We won today against Texas Rangers! 2-1! Woot, it really was an exciting game, but not until after the 7th inning...but I was grateful for the win.

Ok, gotta get ready for bed, and the week... lots to do, work tomorrow and youth group planning meeting, Tuesday I am cleaning all day because on Wednesday we have the land lord coming to inspect the house/do a walk through... and on Wednesday is also mine and Matt's 3rd year anniversary! Where did the time go?!

Till next time.....

have a chocolate chip cookie for me :)

Some Interesting articles and study done for TTCing

I am starting to psych myself out here... All the sudden I really started to fixate on what if Clomid/Metformin/Ovidrel combo doesn't work? So I went looking on line and I found a couple of articles. The first one is on a study that was conducted in Germany on how long it took couples to get pregnant. Reading it I realized how early in the game of "actively" trying to get pregnant we really are... we are only truly in our 2nd month with help from the medication.

Here is the first article:

How soon can you get pregnant after you start trying?

By Rachel Gurevich, About.com Guide

Updated January 02, 2009

About.com Health's Disease and Condition content is reviewed by the Medical Review Board

See More About:

• infertility myths
• getting pregnant
• infertility testing

Question: How soon can you get pregnant after you start trying?

Many couples wonder how soon they will get pregnant after they start trying. When getting pregnant doesn't come easily, it can feel like everyone else conceives after a month or two.

How long does it really take to get pregnant?

Answer:

Researchers in Germany also wondered how soon couples can expect to get pregnant, and they were especially interested in how common infertility and subfertility are. (Subfertility can be loosely defined as someone who takes longer than average to get pregnant, but eventually will succeed on their own without help.)

The researchers felt that previous research on how soon couples can expect to get pregnant eliminated truly infertile couples, or were biased because of their retrospective nature. In other words, the statistics were gathered after pregnancy was achieved, and not collected from the beginning.

In this study, they took a group of 346 women, who were practicing natural family planning methods, to get pregnant. Natural family planning uses tools, such as body basal temperature charting and cervical mucus observation, to determine when the most fertile days are. That means that this group of couples knew which days to have sex if they wanted to get pregnant, so mistimed intercourse would not be behind failure to conceive.

The results are interesting:

• Of the 346 women, 310 women conceived.
• The remaining 10.4%, or 36 women, did not get pregnant.
• After one month of trying, 38% were pregnant.
• After three months of trying, 68% were pregnant.
• After six months of trying, 81% were pregnant.
• After twelve months of trying, 92% were pregnant.

Also, if you looked at only the couples that got pregnant eventually, and eliminated the women who didn’t conceive, 42% conceived in their first month of trying, 75% by their third month, 88% by six months and 98% by 12 months.

In a separate study, they found that while 10% of couples may not get pregnant after 12 months of trying, half of this group would get pregnant after 36 months.

Five percent of couples, however, will try for four years and still not get pregnant. Researchers found that this group of couples was unlikely to ever get pregnant without medical help.

The Bottom Line

If you feel like the majority of your friends get pregnant after only a few months of trying, according to these statistics, that’s probably true. (I always thought it was my imagination that I was surrounded by super-fertile people.)

If you’ve been trying for less than six months, don’t fret just yet. Keep trying.

If you’re older than 35, and you’ve been trying for six months, see a doctor. Since age can be a factor, it’s important you don’t wait.

If you’ve been trying for six months, but you’re younger than 35, you could still see your doctor and ask for an evaluation. Some doctors won’t do fertility testing until a year goes by for women younger than age 35, but if you have truly timed intercourse each of those six months, you may be able to convince your doctor to investigate sooner.

If you’ve been trying for a year and you’re not yet pregnant, you should definitely see a doctor. If you’ve been trying for two, three or four years, what are you waiting for?

Some couples hold out hope, not wanting to face the music. I can completely understand this wish, but the passage of time could lower the chances of fertility treatments working, especially if age is a factor. Don’t waste anymore time -- go see a doctor, and get you and your partner checked out.

Sources:

Gnoth C, Godehardt D, Godehardt E, Frank-Herrmann P, Freundl G. “Time to pregnancy: results of the German prospective study and impact on the management of infertility.” Human Reproduction. 2003 Sep; 18(9):1959-66.

Gnoth C, Godehardt E, Frank-Herrmann P, Friol K, Tigges J, Freundl G. “Definition and prevalence of subfertility and infertility.” Human Reproduction. 2005 May; 20(5):1144-7. Epub 2005 Mar 31

Here is the other article on next steps to take if the meds aren't working:

When Clomid Does Not Achieve Ovulation

Clomid Resistance and Ways to Improve Ovulation Response to Clomid

By Rachel Gurevich, About.com Guide

Updated March 24, 2010

About.com Health's Disease and Condition content is reviewed by the Medical Review Board

While 75% of women taking Clomid for anovulation will ovulate, 25% will not. Without ovulation, pregnancy achievement is impossible. If you don’t achieve ovulation on Clomid, will you need to move on to stronger drugs or more complex treatments? Not necessarily.

Clomid Resistance

Sometimes, the reason you may not ovulate on Clomid is because the dosage is too low. It’s common to start Clomid treatment at 50 mg, and then increase to 100 mg if you don’t respond to 50 mg. In some cases, doctors will try doses up to 250 mg. However, if you’re still not ovulating, your doctor may say you are Clomid resistant.

Clomid resistance is just a fancy way of saying that your body does not respond the way we’d like to Clomid.

What Causes Clomid Resistance?

Your doctor’s approach to treating Clomid resistance depends partially on why he thinks you are not responding. Here are a few known, possible reasons for Clomid resistance:

PCOS: Women with PCOS commonly have trouble with Clomid resistance, especially those who are diagnosed as insulin resistant or with hyperandrogenic levels (high levels of DHEAs and male hormone levels).

BMI over 25: A body mass index (BMI) over 25 can decrease the chances of Clomid working successfully.

Hyperprolactinemia: Women with hyperprolactinemia may not respond well to Clomid, without also treating the hyperprolactinemia.

Of course, there are times when it’s not clear why Clomid is not helping induce ovulation.

Options in Treating Clomid Resistance

For women with PCOS, treatment with the insulin resistance drug Metformin, also known as Glucophage, may help. Ideally, Metformin would usually be prescribed for a period of three to six months before trying Clomid again. Some studies have shown that besides improving ovulation rates, taking metformin and Clomid together may also increase the pregnancy rate and decrease the risk of miscarriage.

Ovarian drilling is an older method of treating Clomid resistance in women with PCOS, but is not commonly used today because of the risks. If your doctor suggests ovarian drilling, you may want to question the reason for that choice, when there are other options that can and should be tried first.

If your BMI is over 25, your doctor may suggest that you lose some weight before retrying Clomid. Losing just 10% of your current body weight may improve Clomid’s effect.

• Could Your Weight Keep You From Getting Pregnant?

For those with hyperprolectinemia, treatment with the drug Bromocriptine, either alone or in combination with Clomid, may improve ovulation rates.

Birth Control Pills for Infertility?

One interesting way of dealing with Clomid resistance is taking birth control pills for one to two months before trying another cycle of Clomid. This is recommended for women with high levels of the hormone DHEAs.

It seems a bit counterintuitive -- birth control pills will help you get pregnant? But research studies have shown good results. In one study on the use of birth control pills, just over 65% of Clomid resistant women ovulated, after taking oral birth control pills for two months preceding a cycle of Clomid treatment.

What if Clomid Still Does Not Work?

Sometimes, ultrasound will show the follicles growing in response to Clomid, but the midcycle LH surge isn't strong enough to bring on ovulation. In this case, your doctor may prescribe Clomid along with an injection of hCG, like the drug Ovidrel, to trigger ovulation and boost the midcycle LH surge.

If after trying these options, you’re still not ovulating on Clomid, your doctor may suggest trying different ovarian stimulating medications. Hopeful studies are emerging about the medication Letrozole, also known as Femara. Studies have shown that Letrozole may induce ovulation in some women with PCOS who do not respond to Clomid, as well as some women with unexplained infertility and Clomid resistance.

In one study, women with Clomid resistance and PCOS were more likely to ovulate when taking the medication Letrozole (79.3% ovulated), than when taking Clomid in combination with two, low dose injections of FSH therapy (56.59% ovulated). Pregnancy rates were also improved, with 23% of the women taking Letrozole achieving pregnancy, and 14% achieving pregnancy with the Clomid and two-injections of low-dose FSH combination.

Letrozole is not, however, sold as a fertility drug, and there is some controversy over the safety of its use. Letrozole can cause birth defects if taken during pregnancy. Many argue that the medication is safe and say that the drug should be out of your system by the time pregnancy occurs, though more research needs to be done.

Other options for treating Clomid resistance include low-dose gonadotropin therapy, with or without IUI treatment. This includes drugs like Gonal-F, Follistim, and Ovidrel, in other words recumbent FSH and LH fertility drugs. These drugs are more expensive and come with more side effects than Clomid, but they may induce ovulation when Clomid fails.

• All About Fertility Drugs
• Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Clomid

Sources:

Ganesh A, Goswami SK, Chattopadhyay R, Chaudhury K, Chakravarty B. Comparison of letrozole with continuous gonadotropins and clomiphene-gonadotropin combination for ovulation induction in 1387 PCOS women after clomiphene citrate failure: a randomized prospective clinical trial. Journal of Assisted Reproduction and Genetics. 2009 Jan 7. [Epub ahead of print]

Goenka Deepak, Goenka ML. Oral contraceptive pill pretreatment for clomiphene citrate resistant cases followed by repeat clomiphene citrate treatment. The Journal of Obstetrics and Gynecology of India. Vol. 56, No. 2 : March/April 2006 Pg 159-161. Accessed online February 19, 2009.http://medind.nic.in/jaq/t06/i2/jaqt06i2p159.pdf

Using Oral Contraceptives as a Treatment for Clomid-Resistant Patients. The InterNational Council on Infertility Information Dissemination: Infertility Journal Summaries. Accessed online February 19, 2009
.

Half way through the week! yay!

More answered prayers and good news today for me, although I cannot talk about them (not baby related, or teaching). But know that I am in a happy place and things are starting to "click"into place. Hopefully everything goes well.

Today I am very tired. It's not as though I didn't get much sleep last night, I got at least 7.5 hrs... The day before was exhausting because I had a full day of teaching without any specialist break (where the kid's go to music, PE, library or art)...but all in all it was a great day. I was ready to fall asleep by 8pm, but I held out so I could watch America's Got Talent and Parenthood (love that show!).

I feel like I am coming down with something. I've been sneezing off and on for a couple of days, and my nose was a little runny last night/this morning. I've also felt queasy (don't worry I'm not equating this to pregnancy or anything...too soon for that anyways)...hopefully it goes away soon. I have a full day of teaching tomorrow and Friday as well.

In pregnancy information ****this is my disclaimer... if you get squeamish about details and TMI, consider yourself warned.... ******

I am afraid that I still am not ovulating. I received the shot last Friday afternoon and it was supposed to release my egg within 36 hours. My temperature went up a little bit, but this morning it went back down. I also don't have any of the true "mucus" signs. I have never experience "egg white mucus", although I have experienced kinda stretchy mucus, but not recently, and it wasn't clear. I have been wet, which is a pre-cursor sign to ovulation...but I still have no idea what I'm looking for...or if I can even depend on these signs. I wonder this because the medications I am taking are chemically altering my system so that it has a full cycle. My body can't do what it's supposed to do on it's own, so would that mean that even the cervical mucus wouldn't match up? All these questions are floating around in my head, I swear I'm a total stress case... I want a baby, and yet I still need to stop and remind myself that it's all in due time and it's God's will be done, not mine. Only He knows when the time will be right, and if I am not supposed to have children, then I have to accept that as well. Adoption is always an option, and it is also one I look favorably upon.

As far as "symptoms" I'm experiencing... I know it's too soon, but I do feel some twinges down there, and have been more tired recently. I wonder how quickly one is affected by pregnancy... is it after the egg has embedded itself in my uterus? I also read that the uterus begins to expand immediately, does this mean at conception? or does this mean once it is embedded as well? I also feel sore in my uterus, but I've been exercising and using some of those muscles in the abs as well. Friday is my blood draw, which means Monday or Tuesday I will find out if my progesterone levels went higher to indicate ovulation. Why does all this take so long?! heehee

**** Ok, back to non-baby stuff...******

Tomorrow the Seattle Archdiocese will hold a press conference to name the new Archbishop to succeed Archbishop Alex Burnett. I am anxious to see the new direction and leadership this diocese will have. He will have big shoes to fill and a tough job ahead of him; the Northwest and Seattle in particular is very diverse, even within the Catholic faith. This new Archbishop will also be responsible for helping to induct the new Latin Rite mass which will be put in place beginning next year. Very interesting in deed :)

While we are on the subject of Catholic happenings, tonight I am going to a two hour talk about the Theology of the Body. It was something I was privileged to study at WWU with peers, and it is something that not many people know about. It was written in the late 60's/early 70's I believe before Pope JP II was even pope. I'm excited to see people's reaction at the talk tonight. Should be great fun! :)

In other news, Matt and I will hopefully be getting a sectional couch soon! yay! can't wait! :)

This is the one we like so far, and it would come with a mating ottoman as well

Till next time....

Getting Amp'd up for today!

It felt sooooo good to sleep in this morning. I don't think it was a second past 10:30am when we got out of bed. Yay for sleep :)

Despite sleeping in, today has been a productive day. I put together song sheets for our praise and worship part of tonight's Life Teen youth group kick off bbq! So excited about that! Now I have to find an ice breaker to play with a small group and find my George Foreman Grill for grilling...shouldn't be too hard though.

I also took my momma to the grocery store and was able to finally get some food in this house! Fish is so cheap right now. I got Sockeye salmon for $2.75, $2.50 and $3.54... nice cuts, fresh and not frozen... I can't wait to cook it. I'm normally not a fish person, but I'm hoping to force myself and Matt to eat it more b/c of all the healthy benefits from eating fish. I never thought a day would come where I would be so excited about fish, and fish at a cheap price...that I would blog about it. ha ha I'm a nerd!

After eating lunch and putting away all the groceries, I mowed the lawn and I've done the dishes and thrown a load of laundry into the wash. See, told you I was productive!

My husband thinks I was being cranky, and maybe I was a little...but I thought I was being clever. He was sitting on the couch watching the Seahawks when I got home from the grocery store. I had made two trips with bags in two before going out to get the 3rd... and I said, "Yes hon, I would like some help with carrying in some of the groceries, you are so sweet to have asked." "He was like, what? ugh.. oh..." and then he helped :) I love sarcasm... thank you honey for helping, I appreciate it.

Tonight will be a great night, I am hoping. Families and teens will be at the bbq and hopefully most will come back!

Alrighta... talk at you lata!

Awesome Day

When my alarm clock went off this morning I did not want to get up... somehow bye the grace of God, I made it. Why did I have to get up at the butt crack of dawn? For an awesome Life Teen training with parishes from all over the Northwest. I had a really great time meeting new people and hearing about the things that are and are not working in different youth groups in the area. We also were able to get great advice from our peers as well as grow closer with my own youth group posse. Plus, my friend brought her adorable baby-kins and he was our comedic relief (sometimes at inappropriate times, i.e. prayer times..I couldn't help it... his baby toots and burps are too cute!)

My hormones were a little wonky at times today. I kept crying during all the praise and worship songs... mainly because, I think I was happy...I mean, I know I was happy; but it was great to be singing songs I haven't sung since leaving my old parish. It stirred something deep within me, and I want to be part of a choir again...I just don't want to be part of any of the choirs at my new parish...I know that's bad...but I wish we could start another one up for Life Teen. We will see what God has in store.

So, after a great wonderful day of learning and ministering and... eating lots of sugar... Matt and I headed off to Seattle for my friend's 30th birthday party! It was a great time and wonderful food! It was held at the Broadway Bar and Grill... Yummiest food ever! The Butternut Squash Ravioli is to die for! Anywho... it was great to see friends I haven't seen in a long time; not only the birthday girl, but a friend I haven't seen since I had just graduated WWU. It's so crazy b/c we're both married now and I found out he lives only 10 minutes away from Matt and I! Hopefully we will get to hang out with them more. His wife is lovely and they are so cute together! :) One of my best friends and her boy friend were there too! I always love it when I get to hang out with them. Matt and I were walking back to the car and I was smiling and I told him that I was happy that I have been able to pull together different groups of friends from different sources. I've known the friend who brought her boyfriend for over 16 years (scary, huh?) since 6th grade and the friend whose birthday it was, I've known for 8 and we met at WWU. I like bringing people together :) I just wish everyone had more time so we could hang out more. I've really missed my friends a lot; and I have been blessed to hang out with so many this week, it's done wonders for my spirit.

I'm looking forward to next week (except for the blood draw on Friday)... I sub on Tuesday, Thursday and Friday so far. On Wednesday I take my mom to her PT appointment. Maybe I will get Monday off? I have to work on getting the house in tip top shape... our land lord is coming to inspect on the 22nd (Happy Anniversary to Matt and I), hopefully all will go well.

Till next time, God Bless

Remembering 9/11

I will never forget hearing my mom's voice yelling at me to get up. To say I was a bit miffed to be woken up so early on one of my last days to sleep in before heading off to college would be an understatement. I will never forget the images that were burned into my mind that day. Security and innocence were lost that day, not only for me, but for our nation. I couldn't believe what I was seeing, and at first I thought it was some sick joke being played on TV or a clip from a movie coming out. When I saw my mom's face, I knew that it was real. I still can't help but cry for those that lost their lives that day; either at Ground Zero or Pentagon, or the heroes whose plan went down in the field. The loss of life, and all the lives that they touched will never be the same. It especially hits home for my husband, who on a daily basis would talk with employees in the towers as part of his job.

I will never forget how eerie it was to not hear a single plane in the sky. Or how kindly it seemed that we started to treat one another. 9 years later, we, as a country have seemed to go back to our lives. We are more comfortable, the hard work and sacrifice of our soldiers are finally coming to fruition. I am proud to call United States home, and I hope that as a society we continue to treat each other with respect and from a place of caring.

Here is something I found....

The Following was taken from http://www.catholic.org/national/national_story.php?id=29252

"God of peace, bring your peace to our violent world:
peace in the hearts of all men and women and peace among the nations of the earth."

NEW YORK, NY (Catholic Online) - When the Vicar of Christ visited the United States he made a special visit to "Ground Zero", a truly American site of prayer and reflection and he prayed. The words of that beautiful prayer are as stirring today as they were on April 20, 2008. In memory of all those who died, those who still suffer, those who still grieve their loss and for a Nation which today reflects on the event and what it means for the future, Catholic Online offers the Pope's Prayer:

O God of love, compassion, and healing,
look on us, people of many different faiths
and traditions,
who gather today at this site,
the scene of incredible violence and pain.
We ask you in your goodness
to give eternal light and peace
to all who died here—
the heroic first-responders:
our fire fighters, police officers,
emergency service workers, and
Port Authority personnel,
along with all the innocent men and women
who were victims of this tragedy
simply because their work or service
brought them here on September 11, 2001.

We ask you, in your compassion
to bring healing to those
who, because of their presence here that day,
suffer from injuries and illness.
Heal, too, the pain of still-grieving families
and all who lost loved ones in this tragedy.
Give them strength to continue their lives
with courage and hope.

We are mindful as well
of those who suffered death, injury, and loss
on the same day at the Pentagon and in
Shanksville, Pennsylvania.
Our hearts are one with theirs
as our prayer embraces their pain and suffering.

God of peace, bring your peace to our violent world:
peace in the hearts of all men and women
and peace among the nations of the earth.
Turn to your way of love
those whose hearts and minds
are consumed with hatred.
God of understanding,
overwhelmed by the magnitude of this tragedy,
we seek your light and guidance
as we confront such terrible events.
Grant that those whose lives were spared
may live so that the lives lost here
may not have been lost in vain.

Comfort and console us,
strengthen us in hope,
and give us the wisdom and courage
to work tirelessly for a world
where true peace and love reign
among nations and in the hearts of all.


Pope Benedict XI--Prayer at Ground Zero
New York, 20 April 2008